Thursday, June 26, 2008
personal essay
And I thought this would be the easy paper to write! I have plenty to write, some 52 years of experiences that have made me the teacher I am today-but I am having trouble establishing a voice. I keep wanting to choose a humorous approach because the more I think about these experiences the more I am afraid of releasing an emotional floodgate that may be hard to control! (Draining a brain that is already wary.) I have had to fight my way to this point in my life and writing about these "mountains" seems overwhelming. Further, I guess I just do not feel comfortable writing about myself, even in a group I trust.
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6 comments:
Do you think if you wrote about all of those "mountains" it would allow you to release some of those emotions? I'll be here for you! :)
Wow, Jackie, that is being really honest. It is harder to do this than I thought too. When telling someone the story, it is much easier than putting it down on paper. I seem to keep wandering around with my thoughts and it seems out of order. I feel like I've never written before.
Hey Jackie, I think Mindy is on to something. What if you wrote and wrote and wrote some of that with NO INTENTION of giving it to us as part of your essay.
And it is perfectly fine to work with humor as your voice. Maybe that is the way, as a writer in this moment, you can render some of the experiences into written language.
I assume you know what you are wary of. And what do you think is the worst thing that can happen? If that is too much to deal with, seriously, than take the safer route until you are feeling more OK about taking somethings into the public realm.
This is putting right where I put my own students and it is good to sit in their shoes for a change. I see myself going off on tangents as I write but I am resisting the urge to edit as I go instead, allowing "mother-tongue" such as it is, to emerge first.
I am just letting go and getting it out of me first. I know I tell my students to do this like it is so easy. I did not realize that it might be hard to let go of the editing control in my brain.
I felt the same way at first too! But once I started and let it out it just started to flow. Try it when you are alone! Sometimes there are mountains we need to leave untouched!!
I am interested in "your story." I have always loved stories and enjoy hearing how the people I work with, have developed into the people I know and like. I think knowing each others stories helps us trust.
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